June 29th, 2023

How to set boundaries in relationships + printable exercise to help

---

Ever come across the saying, "show me your friends and I'll show you your future"? It's a real gem, right? I've made it my life filter for the inner circle of awesome people I surround myself with.
While we can't control every person we cross paths with, we sure can pick and choose who gets that VIP pass to our inner circle. These are the folks we invest our hearts in, as the wise Solomon once said, "Above all else guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life" (Proverbs 4:23). And guarding our hearts begins with safeguarding those precious inner-circle seats.
Now, I get it – there are co-workers, bosses, maybe even ex-husbands, parents, and various other influences we encounter on the daily. Here's the deal: lots of people out there are, well, not exactly poster children for emotional health. That's why we're told to "guard our hearts." Scripture even warns us about being influenced by the not-so-healthy crowd. So, how do we navigate this?
Let me drop one word on you: BOUNDARIES. According to Townsend and Cloud, the brilliant minds behind "Boundaries," keeping it simple is all about "keeping the good in and the bad out." In other words, we decide who gets to be emotionally and otherwise close to us.
When it comes to dealing with folks in your job or personal life, there's one magical word that'll be your BFF: NO. Now, listen up – despite what some traditional Christian circles might preach, saying 'no' is NOT unloving, NOT mean, and definitely NOT a sin. 

​

---

​'No' is your superhero cape when it comes to handling unsafe people, whether they're unsafe emotionally, physically, spiritually, or mentally. And guess what? 'No' is just as valuable when you're dealing with healthy individuals. Yep, Jesus himself said 'no,' and us religious gals can totally learn to respect ourselves and say 'no' more often too.
Now, here's the scoop on boundaries: you're the boss of them! YOU get to decide what's allowed in and what's not. No one can tell you that your limits are right or wrong. Boundaries make sure we're thriving in an environment that's uplifting, Godly, and safe. They create a cozy space where we can love ourselves and others like rockstars. 🎸
I even whipped up a Circle of Boundaries to help you sort out the peeps in your life and decide where they belong in relation to your heart. Go ahead and download it!
Quick disclaimer: If you're in an abusive relationship of any kind, please make sure to protect yourself and seek help. 💪
I hope this little wisdom drop serves you well, sis! 🌸💕

​

---